Chapter 12: Textual relations

~*Edward*~

I grinned to myself. I was feeling smug, like the big fat Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland. As of tonight, Bella would be working at Masens. She would be working with me. I needed someone to handle the paper work and she needed a decent job. It was a win/win solution for us both; the fact I'd be seeing a whole lot more of her was an added bonus. Not wanting to offend her, I was a little unsure if Bella would actually take me up on my offer. I'd anticipated some reluctance on her part but when she'd eagerly accepted I felt a sigh of relief leave my lungs. Before anything else could be arranged my cell phone vibrated in my pocket with a reminder that I was due elsewhere in fifteen minutes. "Fuck!"

She was leaning against the counter as she cocked her head to the side. "Everything ok?"

"Yeah, sorry…just an errand to run for Alice which slipped my mind. I'm gonna have to run out on you but you can start whenever you like." I shoved my phone back in to my pocket and pulled out my keys.

She smiled shyly as she spoke. "Um...well...would tonight be ok? If not then I can...."

I cut her off mid sentence "Tonight is perfect." The prospect of seeing her again so soon made my heart racing with excitement. As I headed for the front door it suddenly occurred to me that my reaction should have been a little less intense and a little more nonchalant. "Stop by whenever you like and we can hash out the details over a beer. That sounded better, right?

I turned around to see that she'd followed me to the door to see me out. Christ, I couldn't take my eyes of those fucking pyjamas. I wasn't lying when I told her I loved SpongeBob, but fuck did I love him a whole lot more when he was scattered over her ass....over her chest. I snapped my eyes shut. Focus you pervert, focus!

She nodded. "Ok so I'll see you tonight then?"

In an attempt to appear casual and indifferent, all I could actually manage was a goofy fucking grin and a nod in response. I waved and made my way down the front path, my car unlocking with a beep and a quick flash of the headlights.

"Edward...?"

I turned on my heels, rewarded with another glimpse of those fucking adorable PJ's and the creamy skin they exposed. "Uh…Yeah?"

She grinned, a huge smile spreading across her face. "Thanks for the beer."

"Anytime. The...uh...apple...was more than worth it"

It wasn't until I was in the car with my foot slammed down on the gas that I remembered where I was supposed to be going. The spontaneous beer run had seemed like a good idea at the time but now all I could think about was a scantily clad Bella, and I had a moon bounce to procure. Fucking Alice! Aaron was turning five in a few weeks and everyone, willing or otherwise, had been coerced into helping with the party planning. I bitched, I whined, I moaned like an unhappy whore. Fuck, I even resorted to begging, but all of it was to no avail. All it had gotten me was an insanely long list of supplies which had been crammed into my hand and a fucking pat on the back.

I slipped into the closest parking space and pulled the crumpled list from my pocket. Giving it a quick scan, I sighed with relief when I realized that nearly everything had been satisfyingly crossed off with a big red pen. My work here was almost done, with only two tasks remaining. All I had left was the choosing and renting of a moon bounce and the purchasing of an epic amount of decorations, the latter of which I actually found a little daunting. I loved the kids, and I knew little boys liked spaceships, trucks, dinosaurs and that kinda shit but when it came to decorating and fucking color coordination I was hopeless. I found myself thinking of Bella again, and her choice of bed wear. She obviously had a childlike side. I'm pretty sure she'd know what color the balloons should be and what kind of napkins to get. And then I found myself wishing she were here with me.

I locked the car and headed inside what could only be described as moon bounce hell. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and figuring it was Alice calling to check on me I yanked it out in frustration. Frustration that turned into confusion when the screen alerted me to a text from an unknown number.

So what does Alice have you doing that's so important you leave like your ass is on fire? B

B? Bella? It couldn't be her, she didn't have my number…..did she? I hesitated only for a second before hitting reply.

You wouldn't believe me if I told you. How did you get my number?

My phone vibrated almost instantly.

Try me ;) You are on list of emergency contacts for the sitter. Alice keeps it on fridge. Fridge contains chocolate. B

So it was her! And now I couldn't resist poking fun.

Shopping for moon bounce. Am in inflatable hell. Kill me now pls. How very ninja stealth of you. 007 would be jealous of your mad spy skillz

I took a seat on a stray bench for lazy customers, figuring this back and forth may not be ending just yet and hoping I was right. I was surprised at her making contact, and even more so by her apparent sass.

007 is a pansy ass - has nothing on me! Moon bounce? Business or pleasure Mr Cullen? :P B

I was fucking dying to ask her if she was still wearing those pyjamas but thought better of it. I'd fucking hate her to think that I was some kind of texting pervert.

Neither! Forced against my will. Orders from Gnome Queen. Also in charge of decorations. FML

Her reply was almost instant

I hate Alice too. Hey! How come you bagged the fun stuff? I got stuck with invitations and the cake!! B

Bella and cake, cake and Bella. Fuck!

The cake? Christ! No pressure then ;) Fun stuff? Are you kidding? I don't know my ass from my elbow when it comes to party decorations…let alone a kids party!

Who knew cake could cause nervous breakdowns! Tap into your inner child. What would five year old Edward like? B

I smirked

Five year old Edward would really like five year old Bella to come with him. He needs help and just fyi he doesn't have cooties.

She says she'll come, but only in exchange for a bag of gummy bears and adult Edward's help with the cake. B

Tell her she has a deal. Must go procure moon bounce - wish me luck!

Good luck :) See you tonight Eddie. B

I laughed hard, no doubt looking like some crazy fuck as I sat chuckling to myself on my solitary bench. I usually hated Eddie. It felt different coming from her. Huh. I took a minute to snap back to reality and focus on my moon bounce mission.

Twenty-five minutes later I was frantically tugging on my hair and planning an escape route.

"So, like, do you wanna like, try it out? You know, like bounce on it?"

The sales assistant was an overeager, man eating teenage girl who was sporting curly blonde pigtails, a wonky name badge and a skirt so shamelessly short it should only really be classed as a belt. "Like" was apparently her favourite word and she was looking at me like I was her next snack. Jesus fucking help me now. If I could just get a distraction….like some naughty little deviant kid running around wielding a pair of sharp scissors, popping every fucking moon bounce in sight….

"No I don't want to bounce on it I just want to rent the damn thing" I sighed, irritated.

Her greedy face fell, perhaps at the realization she wouldn't be getting an invite to "bounce" with me after all.

"Oh...well then you need to go and see the guy at the desk." With a huff and hair flick she was gone, prancing her way over to another poor unsuspecting customer.

I made a bolt for the desk while I still had the chance and five minutes later I was in the safe confines of my car and heading for the nearest drive thru with my mission accomplished. I had obtained one giant fucking multicolored moon bounce for the delight of thirty-five screaming little ankle biters who will undoubtedly have eaten more ice cream and cake than their tiny little tummies can handle before bouncing commences.

I sent a quick text to Alice letting her know that I will not, under any fucking circumstances, be on fucking puke patrol.

Scored a moon bounce. Will NOT be on puke duty . I don't do vomit. Ever. For anyone. Even you.

There. Take that Gnome Queen. Edward has spoken, you have been told.

I drove up to the window, about to place my order, when my phone buzzed with a reply from Alice.

Bella's helping with the chunk blowers

Well fuck and shit!! That was a low blow even for Alice. That bitch had used dirty persuasion tactics and the worst part was that they'd fucking worked! I would be reporting for puke duty after all. But not just for anyone. For Bella.